Women often complain that men change after a few years in a relationship, while men often wonder how the beautiful and intelligent girl they met a few years ago has turned into this whining, forever-complaining woman. Maybe neither of the partners is to be blamed, and it is just that after a few years in a relationship, the novelty begins to wear off.
To ensure that your relationship is rock solid, there are a few investments and sacrifices that both the partners need to make. Here are a few tips which may be of some help to men who are in a relationship, or aspire to be in one. Those who have come out of a nasty one to start all over again, can also take a look.
Sharing what you are going through can go a long way in ensuring that you and your partner are on the same page. Many men put off the idea of sharing their difficulties with their partner because they think that she can't really help them much in dealing with the situation.
Transparency also means talking to your partner about misunderstandings that usually happen in a relationship. Talking about these problems helps both of you to deal with the situation in a prudent way.
What course of action do you take when you are stuck in an argument which has completely deviated from its origin? Do you retaliate, or choose to become the bigger person by following the policy of non-retaliation. An argument usually spirals out of control when there are a few suppressed feelings that are looking for a way out.
As we mentioned previously, if you don't talk consistently to your partner about the things, or habits you feel she can do without, you create a reservoir of anger that is ready to explode. And, when it comes to something which starts as a squabble, these pent-up emotions act as the catalyst for a full-blown war.
The point we are trying to drive here is that you should shed away the emotional baggage that all of us tend to carry when we are not able to communicate effectively with our partner, or for that matter, someone who are close to.
Another exercise at damage-control is to give the other person a free run by choosing not to retaliate. We understand that it is difficult to achieve as backing off may signify that you didn't have an explanation for the accusation, but you also got to remember that you can talk about all of this with a sober mind when the heat has cooled down.
To cut the long story short, one of the best things that can work for you is to take a timeout and give each other some breathing space. By timeout, we don't advise you to have a drink and arrive five minutes later to fight with an increased vigor! Ideally, a couple of hours or more will be good enough for some good sense to prevail on both of you.
And trust us, when you sit down to talk about what went wrong and how to amend it, the realization will dawn upon both of you that the issue at hand is minuscule and can be sorted out way too easily.
Priority Level: 1
One of the most important challenges men face is how to prioritize relationships. There are times when you are not able to deliver on your promises because of professional reasons. Also, it can also be the case that you headed to the bar with your 'pals', forgetting that you had planned to buy groceries with your wife.
While it is important that you give importance to your office as well as your friends, the pertinent thing to remember here is that the commitments you make to your better half that should be on top of your priorities. You need to remember that your partner is someone who is going to stay with you for the rest of your life.
If you like to meet your friends once in a while, ensure that you are not doing it at the cost of the quality time you could have spent with her. One way of doing this could be to plan in such a way that you go for that 'boys night out' at the same time when she goes for a trip with her girlfriends.
If your work is stopping you from going home on time, make it a point to speak to your manager about it. Prioritize your relationship in such a way that your partner feels that you really value her more than anything else.
All Those Crushes
There will always be someone who will be the subject of your infatuation despite that fact that you are committed, or married. We guess it is natural that your eyes sometimes brighten up when there are good-looking women around you.
The important thing to remember here is that it is not the feeling of infatuation that ruins a relationship, it is what a man does with this feeling that creates issues.
Let the crush remain a crush. Don't try to be friends with her when you know your feelings for her, if nurtured, can be detrimental for your relationship. All you need to do is resist the temptation of taking it to the next level.
Whenever you feel vulnerable, remember that there is a special someone who trusts you a lot and believes that you will never do any wrong. When you respect the love and feelings your partner has for you, you become self-assured and are unlikely to engage in infidelity.