Like men, even women play mind games to command control in their relationships. MenWit informs you about the various mind games women play with men.
Some girls like to say one thing and mean another. And me being who I am, I’m very straightforward. Everything is very black and white for me. I don’t really like playing mind games.
― Zayn Malik
Women play several mind games with men in order to get their attention or love. They not only manipulate you but also exploit you for their own interest. If you analyze their behavior, you will be able to tell when they are indulging in these scheming mind games.
Women go even a step further to defeat men while playing mind games. Many women play mind games because they want to exercise a sense of control in their relationship. Most of the time, such mind games will affect your relationship adversely.
You will be able to cope with these mind games played by your girlfriend in a better way, if you have the knack of identifying them. This MenWit article intends to help you in understanding the mind games that women play so that you can plan a foolproof strategy to deal with them.
The ‘Waiting’ Game
So, you have finally called her, and she is taking a lifetime to pick up your call. You try to reach her on her cell phone repeatedly, but to no avail. Or you may be waiting for her to pick her up for a date, and she keeps you waiting for hours at a stretch. She does this because she wants you to keep guessing if she is really interested in you. She loves to play the cat and mouse game with you. Observe that after she keeps you waiting, you will start chasing her even more than earlier.
Manipulation
She keeps you waiting because she knows you are dying to be with her.
Surviving the Game
First of all, if she is doing this with you, stop chasing her as if she is the last girl on the planet. Don’t call her if she is not picking your calls. Wait for her to give you a call back. Don’t make her feel that she is the only person who is important to you.
The ‘Sexy Clothes’ Game
You are out on your date, and she purposely comes wearing a stunning outfit which enhances all her curves. This has you ogling at her body. She notices this, gets angry because of it, and says that you are only interested in her body, not her soul. While her intention of wearing such a revealing outfit was to grab all your attention, she reprimands you for acting out of your natural instinct.
Manipulation
She actually wants you to notice her sexy curvaceous body and enjoys seeing you ogling at her.
Surviving the Game
Can’t you see that she has gone to great lengths in wearing an outfit which is bringing out her curves? And she knows exactly how to attract you. Try to ignore her, and do not allow your jaw to drop when you lay your eyes on her. Turn the tables on her by not giving her any kind of attention, and then watch all the fun.
The ‘No Sex’ Game
So, being a hot-blooded male, you expect to get physically intimate with your girlfriend. However, there comes a time when she expects you to give her something in return for sex. This can be an emotional condition, like not going to work, not meeting friends, not watching baseball, or calling a close friend, etc. It can also be a materialistic condition, like taking her out for shopping, ordering something for her on the Internet, or taking her out to the most happening club, etc. And as usual, you have to comply with everything she tells you only because otherwise it will directly result in a ‘no sex’ relationship. Well, if she is using sex as a ruse to have her way, it is high time that you stop letting yourself get manipulated at her hands.
Manipulation
She manipulates you in this way because she knows that you are desperate to get intimate with her and will give anything in return for it.
Surviving the Game
Please don’t become a toy in her hands only to get physically intimate with her. Have some self-respect; don’t just yield to her wants. Tell her that sex is a mutual decision, and you will wait till she is willing and ready for it. Also, tell her that you are really too busy to run errands for her, or you do not have budget at the moment to spend on her. This will just ruin her mind game.
The ‘Handle My Mood Swings’ Game
So, one day while you are taking potshots at her friends, she tells you sternly that you cannot talk to her best friend that way, if you want your relationship. The very next day she has a cat fight with her best friend and comes up with a number of expletives for her. When you keep quiet and don’t say anything about her best friend, she rebukes you for not taking her side or comforting her. Irrespective of the PMS, this will happen most of the time, when your girlfriend will conveniently switch sides according to her mood.
Manipulation
She tries to exploit your good side and likes you to behave according to her mood swings.
Surviving the Game
Unless she tries to use your reactions to her mind games against you, playing along can be a harmless option. However, if she tries to blame you for changing your point of view from time to time, put your foot down, and explain to her that you only do this to make her happy.
The ‘Playing Dumb’ Game
Girls often like to play dumb, because they want you to do their work. Don’t you think, she owns her phone so she knows how to download the infinite number of apps on it? She only gives the task to you because she is either lazy, or she knows you will do anything for her at the drop of a hat. Or she may know how to mow the lawn, but wants you to do it. So, she pretends that she does not know how to go ahead with it. Stop treating your girlfriend like a damsel in distress, if it is totally distressing you.
Manipulation
She knows that you will run to her rescue every time, so she will make you work on things which are meant to be done by her.
Surviving the Game
This is actually a very harmless game unless she is making you run errands for her every day or using you for her benefit. Try to play along until the time you think that her demands have increased with every coming day. Remember, you are not her wish-fulfilling genie. One of the wiser strategies would be involving her in the work and making it a ‘couple activity.’
The ‘Playing Victim’ Game
Tears are the best weapon that women own. Many girlfriends use it every now and then to achieve what they want or to emotionally blackmail you. Not all men give in to this mind game, but if you have a soft heart, you may become a victim easily. Especially, if it is a new relationship, you will do anything and everything under the sun to make your girl stop crying, even if it means skipping work for a day, lending her your precious car, or even deleting friends from your Facebook account because she does not like them. Try ignoring her tears, and she would show you that she is not really ‘the cutest poor thing’ as you had thought earlier.
Manipulation
She uses tears to melt your heart and make you yield to her desires.
Surviving the Game
While sometimes, the tears may be genuine, there will be instances when you will understand that she is clearly playing a mind game with you. You can put it across subtly yet sternly to her that you need to go ahead with what you had planned, and tears will not help. You can also tell her some good things and encourage her to be strong so that she may not feel completely defeated in this mind game.
The ‘We Need to Talk’ Game
This game is really easy to identify. You may be out with your buddies or watching a basketball game on TV. She will interrupt you by calling you up or telling you the most dreaded sentence for boyfriends―”We need to talk.” The conversation may be heading towards, “You don’t find time for me” or “Everything else is important for you other than me.” This means that your plan to watch the game or having a ‘guy time’ with your friends will go for a full toss. Most of the time, these conversations will not delve upon anything important.
Manipulation
She wants to exercise her control on every aspect of your life and wants to be the center of your attention.
Surviving the Game
Try to convince her that you will talk to her after some time when both of you cool down. Tell her that she means a lot to you and you don’t want to say harsh things that you really don’t mean to her in a fit of anger. It will also be good for her to take up this confrontation after sometime when both of you have given it a rational thought. This will allow you the time and space to do what you want as well as make her feel that you are not completely ignoring her.
The ‘Bait’ Game
In this type of game, your girlfriend will bombard you with questions, like “Is this hairstyle suiting me?”, “Am I looking fat?”, “How am I looking in this dress?”, etc. The problem is that if you say, “No, it is looking wonderful on you” or “No, you never look fat”, your girlfriend will infer that you are just not interested in the way she looks. However, you will also face the music if you give your honest opinion and go against the nature of your compliment-fishing girlfriend.
Manipulation
She tries to pick up a fight with you so that you will be sorry that you have hurt her by your words or even by remaining silent.
Surviving the Game
The best way to survive this game is simply by saying sentences of flattery like, “You know you are the most beautiful girl for me” or “You are not too skinny or fat, you are just perfect.” Trust me, a little diplomacy will not only make you survive this game, but also win it.
The ‘Flirt with Others’ Game
If your pretty girlfriend tries to flirt with other men, then she is probably sending out signals to you that you should know what kind of an attractive girlfriend you have. She does this to make you fall madly in love with her. Also, she quite enjoys seeing you puffing fire through your nose out of jealously. She flirts so that you know she is an extremely beautiful girl who is sexually attractive for other men.
Manipulation
She wants you to know that she has the power to attract other men as well.
Surviving the Game
Ignore her while she flirts with others. If you show her that you are jealous, she will only increase her efforts in making you feel insecure. Try to tell her that you don’t get jealous because you have faith in her, and you know that she will never cheat you. This can really change her approach, and she may stop flirting completely.
The ‘Expensive Date’ Game
Is she practically treating you like her credit card? Whether it is new clothes for her or a salon time for her pet pooch, does she make you shell out your hard-earned money for everything? If she takes you to expensive clubs, restaurants, shopping centers, cafés, and makes you pay the bill, she is monetarily manipulating you. This is because she knows that you want to get physically intimate with her and won’t be able to do it unless you listen to her each and every whim.
Manipulation
She will make you ‘pay’ because she knows that you really want to be with her.
Surviving the Game
Try doing this―take her to the expensive restaurant she always wanted to visit, and when the bill arrives, act as if you have forgotten your wallet at home. She will have no choice but to pay for it. This will also indicate to her that you are completely aware of her mind games.
The ‘Silent Treatment’ Game
Now, this one is a classic. Sometimes, when you are out on a date, your girlfriend will just go quiet. You will try to recollect all your actions and words which would have ‘hurt’ her and resulted in this silent treatment. You keep on prodding her with the question, “What have I done?” but she remains silent and expects you to give her the answer. If you delay in realizing how you have irked her, it will only add to her anger.
Manipulation
She does this so that you will keep on wondering what is it that you have done wrong.
Surviving the Game
Stop asking her if you have done anything to chide her. Just remain calm as if nothing has happened. Tell her that she can take her time to cool down, and you will wait for her to have a conversation. This will be an unexpected reaction to her mind game, and sooner or later, she will break her silence to let you know what went wrong.
Apart from these, there are several other mind games that women play on men like the ‘comparison’ game, the ‘ultimatum’ game, the ‘mind reading’ game, the ‘reverse psychology’ game, the ‘selfish’ game, etc. Now that you are completely aware about the mind games women play in relationships, recognize them easily, and don’t forget to plan a strategic counterattack.
