Let us try to understand why do men need women, and why is it that while most men around the world take digs at their own wives and other women and even publicly loathe female companionship, they would rather prefer to be stuck with women than be rid of them. That they’re never really sure of what they want, is quite another debatable matter!
There is scientific evidence to prove that biologically, men and women are wired differently and perhaps, it is this very difference that attracts us to each other, no matter what relationship we share. Aren’t we all looking for someone to complement us and not necessarily behave exactly as we do? Women may not admit it but the “wild” behavior in men is often appreciated at some level by women (turns them on would be a more appropriate expression). There’s a phase that many women go through when they find “bad boys” very attractive, never mind their messy hair or clumsy, unkempt attire or over-the-top machismo attitudes. But the same “attraction” turns into nuisance (turns women off would be an understatement!) when the “crush” graduates into a long-term relationship.
The Eternal Battle of the Sexes
It is no secret that men are indeed naturally wired to crave for physical intimacy and this wiring can be traced back to serve the basic purpose of procreation and furthering the species! But there are other needs that men have that they would expect the women in their lives to fulfill. Most of the male expectations can be traced back to the lives of our ancestors and even other species closest to ours like apes and monkeys (no offense, and they were common to both genders anyway). The male was always the breadwinner (as the hunter, provider, protector, etc.) and the woman was always the caregiver (assuming the roles of the mate, communicator, mother, nurse, cook, etc.). This clear distribution of roles and responsibilities, as stifling as they were for the women as evolution progressed, was quite convenient to men despite being physically more demanding and dangerous. In modern times, an inconsistent overlap in these roles and responsibilities have been liberating for women. However, the men feel they have been handed out a raw deal. The women willingly took on the additional roles of supporting the family but now the guys are confused as ever, about getting their needs addressed. Now it certainly isn’t their fault that they are not “made for” tending to children or doing the dishes!
Male Perspective
Men need women as emotional anchors because they’re not very good with their own feelings (perhaps another biological disadvantage)! Men desire emotional intimacy from women but they are not as clued into reading “cryptic” clues and body language gestures. They need the women to be straightforward and communicate the truth. While batting the eyelids may be a physical turn on for some men, most will not decipher any hidden meanings behind it. As men are still biologically wired to be the breadwinners, they have a prehistoric urge to feel “needed” by the women. While the modern male would prefer a self-sufficient, secure and confident woman, he still looks for appreciation. In fact, he abhors criticism and manipulative behavior and just wants the woman to make him feel important! While the entire world may be singing his praises, at the end of the day, a few gentle words of acknowledgment and appreciation from a woman is really what drives him to greater heights of achievement.
So what other reasons are there for women to exist in men’s lives? Well, we may have summed it all above already. That should be about it! Anything else that you can think of is bound to be derived from the above points. Now that we know why men need women, the next thing to wonder about is, what would men do without women? Well, ultimately probably they would kill themselves, but in the meanwhile, they would treat their newfound “freedom” with the utmost respect! Some activities to celebrate the moment of “glory” would be as follows!
✿ Head to the bar with some equally exhilarated cronies to watch that special football game that’s being played out in honor of the surviving men of the world! The end of the paradigm of male slavery that is marriage! No more “Son, go take a bath, comb your disheveled hair” or “take the trash out” or “Get those crumbs out of your beard and put the damned toilet seat down after you’re done!”. No more watching out for your sisters or daughters from psychopaths. Turn up the volume some more and hail the male species!
✿ What a pleasure it is to drive without old grannies and young girls crossing the roads without a care in the world. Better still, no woman drivers to get on the forever-in-a-hurry masculine nerves! Wow, this should all have happened sooner!
✿ No need to shave, take a bath or tidy up because no one’s going to be looking or checking! Why, even a change of clothes would probably become a once in a blue moon event. This is what freedom feels like.
✿ Words and phrases that are likely to be erased from the dictionary: hygiene, cleanliness, flushing, wiping, systematic, organized, remember, taking care, regularly, haircut, daily, chores, love, warmth, responsibility, duty, cooking, listening, understanding, colors, hues, shades, chick, beauty, anniversary, birthday, emotional blackmail, etc. Words and phrases that will be used more frequently: later, once in a blue moon, never, no need, pizza, beer, take out, disposable, reusable, yes, no, black, white, etc. More than words, grunts, snores, fist fights and swearing might become the new forms of communication. Ultimately, there would be no need for a dictionary or different languages, what with so few words and less need to communicate.
✿ All research would perhaps focus on creating an artificial “egg” (since artificial sperms are supposedly already available!) for survival of the male species. Robots may perhaps become the most important people in men’s lives. Of course, they’ll be mute because “listening” will cease to be an activity and the ear will become a vestigial organ. The brain will be rendered redundant, slowly but surely.
✿ Every morning will present itself with a great excuse not to show up at work. Very soon, there would be no need for permanent employment, no goals, no need to save money, no phone bills to take care of, retirement will be the longest stage of life and getting by every day, somehow, anyhow, will become the survival mantra!
Female Perspective
Generations of women, for several centuries have been trying to “set right” the lives of their men. Women are not entirely clueless about what men want from them. Of course, there’s a plethora of literature about what women want as well, but let us restrict our scope to the topic at hand! But then again, women are hoping to be able to instruct robots to “listen” quietly, mow the lawn, drive women around and “understand” in a bid to replace the men in their lives, and while research seems to be promising in that area, men do not seem to have achieved much despite magical inventions such as washing machines, dishwashers, automatic toilet flushing mechanisms, ready-to-cook food and take-out menus and even sex toys that claim to provide a very real experience! From a woman’s perspective, men would be totally lost without women in the following ways.
✿ There would be no sexual orientation, just the one and only “homosexual male” and a billion of them! Wonder how soon the novelty would wear out on that stuff!
✿ Heading to the bar for viewing football games? That won’t last long without the cheerleaders! And who will the players try to impress without the wives and girlfriends? It would just be a bunch of men running around with no real purpose and a whole other bunch of men watching them, again, with no real purpose. Testosterone overdose, by all means.
✿ Driving without swearing at nannies and little girls and without forever cribbing about how badly women drive? Men will soon realize that just driving away smoothly sans all the bickering is really no fun. Also, they’re not going to stop for directions, so how long are they going to keep driving?
✿ Men are famously “visual” beings. Without women they would virtually go blind! Hairy cave men are certainly not going to be a visual temptation for the ever-wandering eyes! And no, the robots won’t suffice for obvious reasons.
✿ Men are famously insecure about their own emotions. With no women to comfort them, the world would be just full of crazy men wanting to tear each other apart. Shrinks would be in demand for a while but men have always had a problem with seeking help and worse paying a total stranger to talk about their problems. There’s another point of no return.
✿ Without warmth and care, without reaching out for support, the men of the world would simply perish. Women are criticized from time immemorial for being expert gossipmongers, but it is an effective way to monitor the pulse of the neighborhood! Without social attachments, men would just become lonely, boring and self-loathing couch potatoes. There would be no cooperation; only violent, unhealthy competition. Sadly, they won’t even be indulging in violence for winning a woman! Man would just cease to be “human”.
✿ Ultimately the world will begin to look like a mammoth prison camp with hairy, cold and unkempt men fighting over everything and no one (mother, sister, wife or daughter) to stop them or bring order! If you’re a movie buff, you know that countless male villains have been spared the death blow upon a woman’s request! With no women to impress or appease, killing will become a thriving sport! The ensuing bloodbath will mark the quickest end of the human species, sorry, the male species!
Trying to put oneself in the shoes of the opposite sex is quite a task! Believing in the magic of nature is the only true surrender to guessing why men would want to imagine life without women. We’re poles apart naturally, so there must be a way to get along or we would not find ourselves together in this world. We’re meant to be here for each other, we’re meant to complement each other because we’re different. Men need women as companions. When they’re babies they need the mother much more than their father, the grief, illnesses and challenges of adulthood become worthwhile in the company of a comforting woman. One can only infer that they need women in their lives. They may detest the nagging and the constant chatter, they may wish to be left alone for a while, but men would rather have women in their lives than dream of an all-male population driving humanity to extinction.
“Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy.” ~ Henry Kissinger